10. Excrement, herbivore
9. A shallow hole
8. Burning coals, when you have not achieved the proper mental state* to walk across them unscathed
7. Excrement, carnivore
6. It
5. An unidentifiable thing that goes “squish”
4. Excrement, omnivore
3. A deep hole
2. A mud-filled sinkhole in the Everglades*
1. A land mine
*as represented by foot speed
*skip ahead to 4:15 for relevant clip
Are there a lot of people who jog in the Everglades?
Of course not. People don’t jog in the Everglades, they play bocce. You and your silly questions.