Author of MURDER GOES TO MARKET
Dear Judy Wenzel of 307 N 12th Ave Wasau, WI, What happened last year? This is the second time you have used my email address to book yourself into a hotel during the month of September–this time it’s the Best Western on 1001 N. 14th Ave in Sturgeon Bay, WI–and I can’t help but notice … Read more
Dear Dennis and Judy Wenzel of 307 N 12th Ave Wasau, WI, Congratulations on booking your visit to the Lake Breeze Motel Resort in lovely Duluth, Minnesota. I’m sure you will have a very nice time staying in the whirlpool suite for $134 a night ($104 on Thursday!) from September 20th through the 22nd, though … Read more
In the years I have been writing this blog, I have seen a lot of things. Stupid things. Expensive things. Stupid, expensive things. But what I have for you today may be the pinnacle, the ne plus ultra of overpriced idiocy: It’s by Jimmy Choo. It’s made of regular leather embossed to look like snakeskin. … Read more
Me, busy* at work: “Why is Net-A-Porter selling a rubber band ball?” “Wait, it’s a candle? Okay, that’s kind of cool.” Missoni candle “$283.50? For a candle?” “On sale?!” “. . .” “. . .” “. . .” *Very busy.
Dear Lexus of Englewood, New Jersey, I realize that I am breaking with tradition here by writing directly to you, rather than Daisy Zhu, the person who used my email address when she went to your website in search of a 2011 Lexus. But unfortunately, unlike my other correspondents, she didn’t give me a lot … Read more
Dear Sukhmander Singh Who Owns a 2000 Toyota Camry, Congratulations on the oil change on your 2000 Toyota Camry. That was very responsible of you. Most people with a 2000 Toyota Camry might not think it is worth taking it in to the dealer, POWER TOYOTA OF BUENA PARK, to have the oil changed, but … Read more
Because the Ugly Things For Rich People posts aren’t really supposed to be about stuff that is just expensive*, but there are some items that are too stupid to not make fun of on the internet.** Shipley & Halmos “beer sleeve,” $2.50 for 6 By far the cheapest item I have ever posted, and yet, … Read more
Dear Dalbir Singh of 6022 Marshall Ave, Buena Park CA, I suppose, given that I have already received interesting information on other people’s tax returns and loan documents, it was only a matter of time before someone who didn’t care to share their actual email address would use mine for a docusign document relating to … Read more
Honestly, I didn’t think this was going to have to be a series. Dear Daisy Johny Who Is Applying For a Loan In Charlotte, Did you really think this was a good idea? Do you honestly hate receiving email so much that you would arrange to have your financial information sent to a total stranger, … Read more
Dear Daisy Jimenez of 8310 Dahlia Ave, Tampa FL 33619-7434, I know it isn’t a lot of fun getting emails you don’t want in your inbox. I particularly know this, Daisy Jimenez of 8310 Dahlia Ave, Tampa FL 33619-7434, because I am actually getting all the emails you don’t want in your inbox, in my … Read more